Hoarding

The word alone, HOARDING, is an ugly word. It sounds like some ugly troll trudging along a dark road.

Many years ago when I lived in California, I remember a neighbor telling me about another neighbor's home. I don't think the word "hoarder" was used back then, I think she just said it was unbelievably messy, something like that. I was so intrigued. I always am with things like that. It so is beyond my little Brady Bunch lifestyle..So I used the reason that we were having a party, to drop off an invitation when I knew he was not home, but I could easily look through the front windows (I guess I was afraid maybe he had a video camera watching the front door, I don't know..) But I did not want to just walk by his place, without having a reason. I am like that, I like to plan ahead. So I went over with my little invitation, and wow oh wow, the house was so filled with crap, had never seen anything like it. It was like a little rat maze, like all these little trails carved out of crap. And Mr. Pib soda, the cans were everywhere! I could not over stay my viewing, so that is all I ever saw. He never invited us over, but he did come to the party!

Without saying his name..he was just the nicest guy--well who knows..I realize these days that seems like a big statement to make. But at least he seemed so. He was always friendly. He had a job as a programmer or something, I got the sense he was quite brilliant. He saw his mother often. I remember I thought "how could he ever have a date over in that mess!" These are the things I worry about. It clearly was way beyond that!

I moved away in the midst of my first almost divorce from my second husband, so I never saw the house again.

I read that hoarding is largely about being insecure about the future, trying to be prepared and being quite self absorbed. This line struck me "..resist the temptation to worry about the inadequacies of tomorrow because it does not belong to you.." How true! Depression. Childhood issues unresolved and more triggers.

My main goal is for people to get rid of their sh%t. I absolutely cannot stand clutter. Beyond that, I don't even get it. From a very early age, I have always taken such good care of my things. Everything has always had its place. Some may find me over the top, but I don't think I am. I have plenty of free time, sometimes way too much, so it is not like everyday, all day, I clean and organize, but yet everyday I am doing some cleaning and organizing, if that makes sense. I like myself, my children, and when I am married, my spouse, my home, my yard, all around me to be pretty and well cared for and clean, and free of unnecessary junk. I almost think of it like building a continuous church (which is not something I really thought about until this past year..) but it is like that for me, always working in and towards order. Perhaps I am lucky, because it is so easy for me.

I heard a great line on the Hoarding show tonight--he said "this does not look like it even works. If we throw this away, I don't think it will upset your life." That seemed to be the line to end all. Honestly, while I love keeping things in order, I don't really have huge attachment to things. They are all just things, almost everything I have has not been with me forever, and will not be with me forever. I have a small treasure chest in my closet, where I do keep things I have had for a long time, and some for much shorter time. One thing I have is my POW/MIA bracelet from the 70s. My guy never came back (if they did, you were to send your bracelet to him.) That is a very special piece of my childhood. I remember my friend had one, and my mom was nice to order me one. I wore it for years. I have special cards from my kids, artwork they have made me, special cards from my parents, my grandmothers, friends, husbands.. not so sure, those may have been put in place for the respective children--see I am not about holding onto people from love that did not work out..although as we all know, it can be very hard for me to let it go. So maybe I have spent some time hoarding, memories and what ifs..maybe I have had clutter in my head, maybe as I write this I am saying, ah, I am having an ah ha moment..

But back to the box..it is small, it can only hold so much, and I won't be getting a bigger box. That is the point. Because I keep all my things in tip top shape, anything I sell, or most likely give away, is almost like brand new. I would be too embarassed to give away something junky. I love giving things away. It is so easy for me.

I am really concerned about hoarding. Just another problem/addiction for people. It is hard to imagine that it is this big deal for people to get over. If it was up to me, I would just say, "throw out your sh^t" well in a loving but forceful way. Think of the freedom of clearing your mind and your space. This might not work for the full blown hoarders, but for many out there, it is really just taking notice, being present to your life and what you have, and making sense and order out of it.

Spring is Springing

It is not official yet, we have 16 days to go..but even in soggy Washington, spring is evident. We were lucky, at least so far, a very moderate winter, hallelujah! It really makes a difference when it is not pouring or drizzly, day after day after day after day..these past few months have seen plenty of sun. But the dark days are over, the temperatures are rising. The back lawn is almost near needing a goat to mow it..I cannot believe how it has grown. Bulbs are popping.

Five quick fixes..

Change out your door wreath--what, you don't have one? I think all doors should have a wreath. I did not do this in my not so distant past, but for the last 5 years I have become quite enamored with door art. Wreaths are perfect, but so are cute items made to hang on the door, like last month I had huge red sparkly hearts--sounds kid of garish, but they really were perfect (just right for a few weeks.) December were large red Christmas balls. Now, cute yellow bumble bees grace each door.I think at minimum, something new on the door for each season, if you want to break it up by months/holidays, that is more work..but hey, don't you think festive doors are welcoming?

Pick up all remaining junk from your yard..leaves, dead plants, branches, you know all that stuff that you could leave laying around the past 3-4 months. I know I did. By the end of November I am DONE picking up leaves..branches (small) from all the wind, strewn about on the ground, plants that did not survive (these are annuals that I hope sometimes will come back..sometime..usually not..) Weeds. Rain brings weeds. So a couple of weeks ago I did a clean sweep of the yard..what starts as 20 minutes becomes 2 hours, but it looks so nice now.

Plant some little flowers here and there for color pop. Pansies, love them. And what I really love about them is they have babies all over the place, I find pansies all over that I did not plant. They are very vigorous too, which I love. No "shrinking violet" hah.

When you have days, moments, of rain free, snow free, sun filled weather, open those windows and let some fresh air in. Amazing after sitting in a heat forced home for months on end. It really will be like a "breath of fresh air." I can NOT wait to stop using the heater..and I rarely use AC--love no air being forced around.

My favorite..go through your closet, again..I just did a month or so ago, but then one night I was obsessed with going through it again. Things I thought I really wanted, but had not worn for at least a year (and I cannot believe I had anything in that category..) but I did..so go through it again. Unless you LOVE it, don't keep it. You won't love it when you wear it. I had some very nice items, but they just did not fit me right, (I am small and really have certain ways I like things to fit) so I finally pulled the plug on some stuff.

..a sixth idea..go through your decorating magazines, or go buy a few, and look for new ideas. Simple and inexpensive ones. Breath some fresh air into your home.